(realityloop) embrace recursion

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Ask three women that you know if they’re ever been stalked, sexually assaulted or violently threatened by a man. I don’t need to bet money to know you’ll get a yes from one of those women. Too lazy to ask anyone? That’s okay, I’ll fill in the blanks for you. I’ll raise my hand for all three.

- tiny nibbles

I wrote this short story some time around february. It is a fairy tale and it is not the final draft.

Once upon a time a fairy, maybe just like any other fairy in fairyland, was zooming around the woods looking for something she felt missing. She didn’t know the shape or the color, but deep inside the fairy was hoping to find it. She was tired by some means. Empty and cold words were everywhere. Actions followed the same old routine. She felt numb, flying without purpose, trying to see the mesmerizing in life so she could continue with her kind, but failing nevertheless.

One day, while pursuing a leaf, she saw somebody and awkwardly acknowledged his being there, but as soon as she came home she forgot about it. The fairy continued her labors as usual; with the difference that now every time she went to the woods there he was, maybe not expecting her, but there all the same. They eventually became friends. One time she went to his home, a marvelous mirrored tree; within crystals and more mirrors. The fairy looked herself and saw her fair shimmering skin, her not so like flower body, her odd hair color but nothing mattered, he invited her again. Inside the ensemble of reflections they realized that her sparkle and his glitter combined made a multicolored fire that varied its temperature accordingly to their wishes. It became their favorite game, playing with the fire, its color, shape and heat. They uncovered the ways of the fire until it no longer burned.

Every night after that, they saw each other. The fairy liked his company and the fire they created so much that she could not think of anything else. Everyday since then she expended her morning and evening looking for some present to give to her new friend, alluring drops of Calla Lillie’s blood, impressive tears of azucenas, fascinating symphonies trapped in snails, spellbound honey inside pumpkin seeds. Everything extraordinary she found, she brought for him. He accepted them as the most natural occurrence in the woods. Once in a while he gave her a piece of his mirrors as gift.

Time passed and for once she asked him want kind of gift he wanted for the next night. He said: “I always wanted to fly.” The fairy happily and excited answered: “I will teach you.” No everyday he asked her for something. The next days she went on the quest. She wanted him to fly. The fairy robbed dust from her friend’s skin, collected feathers from all the wings owners she knew, risked her wellbeing hunting the perfect leaf vein to saw everything together. Finally she came back to him, proud of herself because of her gift. However he looked at it with disdain.

- What is this?

- Wings, love, wings to make you fly.

- But these are feather wings, not silk shimmered fairy wings like yours. Everybody will think I’m some weird creature. I wil be no bird, no unicorn, no angel or no kirin.

Sad, she concealed her tears and put her failed present aside. The fairy hugged him knowing it was the fastest way to make the fire appear again. It didn’t matter that her gift wasn’t good enough for him. The fire was the same and now she couldn’t live with out it. Tears didn’t dim it.

Nonetheless all was different. She thought that her wish was heating the fire, because this pain was not usual. Then, she realized, he was tearing her wings away. The fairy didn’t move, the fire began to burn, but the fire was everything, to escape was to resign the fire and the pain caused by this will be greater. The fairy didn’t move. She just waited surrounded by her wingless body reflections for him to return. Because, he was going to return. He needed her now to make his new wings work. Upon his arrival she was going to be there and then the fire will be as beautiful as always.

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